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might be of an interest to you.

yeah i will start with saying "hey since last september i havent written anything " and all of this horse shit

but really i dont care ...i come here wearing my dark cape an im invisible for human eyes for a year or so.

but nothing has lately attracted my attention

and i wanted to say

Katrine.....come on get it over with

Misty....dear there comes a time when u can make sense

thats mostly been on my chest for sometime

aaahh what a relief.

its somehow yellowish and brown

i started drawing this drawing of lioness she had a very big eyes quite wide

then something happened i started running away i was on this ledge and the sea was screaming and it was dark blue everything around was painted in that color

then my cell phone rang i knew the number of someone i dont like i was about to press cancel then i suddenly pressed the key to answer

the voice sounded so irritating its some guy from work with me whom i hate his guts he asks me trying to be clever why my voice is so different....i talk and i realize its different its as if i havent spoken or used it in ages or i smoked about 3 packs of cigrettes or something
i start talking in a very despitful manner but not wanting to sound rude

the man on the other end of the conversation was trying to figure if i was on drugs or not ....and this kind of doubt in my intentions made me sick with anger if he was infront of me i would have broken his neck that was the feeling during the little conversation

then im back in the house the yellowish house with the lioness she came to life after i drew her and i was at the end of the house and she was near the door to outside i approched her in the first worrying that she might eat me then i looked her in the eye and knew that (i dont know how) i can fear her with my strength i kept looking in the eye and once i was near her she kind of had tears in her eyes out of scarefulness.....

the i shouted and addressed her with my hand to leave "LEAVE,get out of here" i was screaming

and while i was doing that there was a little child near to my right leg who kept saying "no, dont let her go" and he was sad

i didnt mind him i even didnt look at him...then the lioness fleed and ran on the stairs downward i looked inside the house and in the shadow in a corner there was a lion bigger than the lioness when i looked into his eyes i knew that i drew him too i told him in a loud voice "YOU TOO,LEAVEEEE"

he ran immeditly as i said the words following the lioness and the little child kept saying "noooooo" and he cried like i was breaking his favourte toys.

i woke up and i was sweating it wasnt a bad dream i wasnt scared i just had this thought kind of bumping in my head saying "everything u draw will come to life" and "the little child is u,or the child in u"

i dont like these kind of confusions i couldnt sleep again until i came to work.

im just wondering whoever will read this....

i have a question for u

if i asked u who is your God?

what would be your answer?

hey i have this Devious thought....why is there an Oedpious complex for men...why isnt my dad concerned in my complexies...does that mean i will never get to marry a women who has something in common with my Father...

i believe im looking for this woman who is a woman enough to be my man not a change in roles but someone who can be my friend my father and not worry about me like my mother and i can speak the truth to without framing it nicely someone to call home a miniture of the external sociaty...im trying to seek this woman .

and i dont really like psychology